To paraphrase Patton Oswalt: this is a failure tea in a sadness cup. This is the first time that a tea has upset me – I got over it after a few minutes, but man, I wasn’t in a happy place for those few minutes.
I’m thinking “Yippee! I adore jasmine and I’ve been dying to try a pearled tea!” I even found the teapot my mom gave me when I started on my tea journey (a glass Bodum) so that I could watch the agonized tea leaves (wait, what?). Not impressed with the show. I only enjoyed it once I started adding sound effects in my mind of screaming leaves or tiny little “enhs.” I sniffed the sample pouch and thought, “oh, this should be lovely!”
And then I poured it.
Two wafts of a smell hit me as I poured and I was rather shocked. I had a moment of bewilderment where I thought that maybe I had grabbed the Vanilla Jasmine instead. I double-checked the bag: nope, it definitely was pearls.
Then I sniffed and that smell that I thought was vanilla was there. I sipped and oh lordy, the disappointment. Within a few sips I was able to nail what that smell/taste was that bothered me (because I was only getting the tiniest hint of jasmine): it’s a freaking half-eaten Tootsie Roll Pop. You know that point where most of the lolipop is gone (I’m thinking grape) and you’re almost transitioned to the Tootsie Roll? Yeah, that’s it. I hate Tootsie Rolls and I hate their “Pop” brethren.
I gave it a second chance with another steep and it mellowed quite a bit to where I’m tasting more tea, but once something has been smelled it cannot be unsmelled.
Ultimately, Tootsie Roll Pop lovers should rejoice and think about trying a sample of this tea. GA
I love Patton Oswalt!
I adore both him and Zach Galifianakis :D
What a great review. I just learned that Jackie O liked Tootsie Rolls and then I read your review. Tootsie Roll pops right now have a very high Q rating with me.