The number one tea, beating out tens of thousands of other teas worldwide, ranked by us experts here at Steepster, at least at some point. So, this is my third sheng ever. Is it going to give me a spiritual experience? Change my life? Make me a better person? I mean, it’s number one, after all, meaning it beats out rare teas that cost thousands of dollars. It had better be something special. Plus! It’s in this handy little ball shape, an innovation so groundbreaking that the company views it as intellectual property. Patent-pending, you guys!
Anyway, I’m even putting aside the douchebro marketing tactics for a second. You see, Misty Peaks would like me to give out its adorable little balls to all my friends who are “not a size zero” in order to fat-shame them into buying expensive teas. Because it believes all us women over a size zero are not f***able or something, and we had better do something about it!
Steeps 1 and 2, 5 seconds each: Astringent, vegetal. Blech. Disappointing because the wet leaves smell sweet and molassesy. No spiritual epiphanies yet. I like this better than a mushroom-y tea, but it’s far too vegetal for me to enjoy so far. I will withhold a number rating until I have a few more steeps, just to see if it gets any better. Why? Because I am fair, even to shitty companies that I don’t like.
Steeps 3 and 4 , 7 seconds each: Astringent, no new developments. I’m not even drinking all of it — tasting and then pouring the steeps out.
Steeps 5 and 6: And… Yep, still not tasting anything that redeems this for me. Good thing I can live without it, because I never want to purchase from this company again.
As this was going down, I kept thinking the flavor reminded me of something, but I couldn’t figure out what. Then it came to me while I was pondering the unpleasant sour aftertaste: It tastes like acid reflux. Mmmm!
I guess sheng quite this young is just not for me.
Flavors: Astringent, Bitter, Sour, Vegetal