My back hurts today after gutter cleaning on my roof yesterday. I couldn’t sleep and feel like crap, so why not just feel worse and drink some of the most awful tea sludge I can find? Also, I made certain to pick a tea that contains Sucralose (aka Splenda) which gives me the scoots something terrible. I shouldn’t really review this but once in awhile I like to shock the children who think I only drink the finest puerh.
This is a 20 oz bottled tea beverage marketed to sports types, weight lifters etc. It contains black tea, lemon juice, 40 grams of whey protein (probably caseinate) and 2500 mg of something called BCAA. I don’t know what that is, but it could be like growth hormones for Big 10 Bull College weightlifters? Anyway, I found this for 99 cents at the local Bent ’n Dent, it normally sells for like $46 for a case of 12 bottles and reviews on the Vitamin Shoppe prove some people buy this stuff. Mine is a few weeks out of date, just to add to the fun.
I drank 1/3 bottle chilled, at first I thought it was kombucha because it tastes sour and tangy, like fermented tea. Without preservatives, maybe it HAS fermented by now. Or maybe it is the lemon? The offending beverage is clear, however, so the casein is hidden in there somehow. I was sure this had gone bad, but a few sips more and I’m not so sure now. I think this could be how it really tastes. Basically like sour lemon and then the Sucralose hits me with a blast of artificial candy and lingers forever. Because Sucralose isn’t digested by the body, I fully expect to be in the toilet within an hour.
Okay I got through 1/3 of it, cramps are coming on. For those of you worried about trying sheng puerh, there are worse things to be drinking, homegrown in the west. This is one of them.
Flavors: Artificial, Lemon, Sour